Monday, December 2, 2013

2:45am


 
The phone rang.
I picked it up.

From the other line, with your weary voice,

I heard you say

That you are sincerely sorry and that you love me very much.

You can’t afford to lose me.

You can’t live without my presence.

That you are going to change

Without leaving a trace of how you were in the past

-the insensitive and intolerable you-

For ME, for US.

That this time, it’s for real.

And you promise not to wreck this one last chance

That you ask of me.

But then, who I hear

Is the very same fool who spoke to me yesterday.

And for the second time I say,


“Sorry po, wrong number.”








Hencel Lauren
(written in high-school/no date)






 
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Sunday, December 1, 2013

In Gratitude



You enter the domain of a barbaric tribe
Aiming to urbanize the uncivilized
Insanity fills the air

There are so many of us and only one of you
Armed with books, class records, and a ball pen
But man, how you scare the hell out of my armpits?
(Ah, I forgot I have my chair)

You ask mind-tumbling questions
You tire me with compulsory nonsense
You give written tests my brain can hardly endure
You discuss the impossible

When I get the chance to say my piece
You’d look me from down to up
Scrutinizing and criticizing every detail
You see, hear, feel, smell (and taste?)

You made me ask if I deserved all of it
I almost believed something’s wrong with me
I felt oh, so sorry for myself
I don’t and would never, ever, get it

That was what I thought

But now, I realized that
You taught me love in hate
What’s wrong and right
What’s simple to complexity
What’s hard when it's easy

You even taught me how to write a poem

I imagine myself on that most awaited afternoon next to my
Debut, college graduation, my first flight, my first job,
My wedding day, my first baby…

I see you taking it all as just an annual happening
No big thing
Nothing too special

It’s a good thing you know that we’ve waited an eternity for this
(We even thought it wouldn’t come)
So you try to can your frown and manage a steady smile
(Thanks for the kind consideration)
And as we go further to the direction you keep pointing to
You'll get smaller, and smaller, and smaller
And me, I want to be BIG! REALLY BIG!
So that someday, when I get REALLY, REALLY BIG
I could get back on you

I’d look you from down to up
I’ll scrutinize and criticize every little bit of you
For choosing to stay where we left you

I then believed that you deserve it
But then, do you?

You don’t.

So fine, I’ll shut up.

On that big afternoon we’ve all been eager for
I’ll be patient not to throw you a frown
I'll just keep a steady smile on my face
Then maybe, we could take some pictures
For in fairness, that is what you really deserve

So allow me to write this:
From the bottom of my intestines, thanks very much
I apologize for being such a nut case
It's just I’ve always thought that
My eye bags were heavier than yours.


Hencel Lauren
H.S. Graduation 2001




 
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Changing World



In this world, everything changes
Because no such thing is forever
But I know, whatever change
In this world I will encounter
However my future will be like
And no matter how much time
Will pass by
I will always be ME…

The girl who
Hugged her father,
Kisses her mother,
Argues with her sister,
And scolds her brother

The girl who made you
Laugh, cry, and smile

The girl who believes that
Life is nice and beautiful
And must not be taken for granted

The girl who loves God above all else…




Hencel Lauren 1999




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Sulok




Dito sa isang tabi,
Ako'y nakaupo,
Nagtatanong,
Nag-iisip,
Umiiyak.

Dito sa isang tabi,
Tanging mga ding-ding
Ang karamay at
Katulong sa pagtugon
Sa aking mga katanungan.

Dito sa isang tabi,
Ako’y nagdarasal
Na sana’y ‘di lamang
Mga ding-ding ang
Nakakarinig sa akin.

Sana Siya rin
At nawa’y matulungan
Niya ako
‘Pagkat ako’y sawa na
Sa kakaupo,
Kakatanong,
Kaka-isip,
At kaka-iyak.


Hencel Lauren 2000





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